Jingle All the Way (1996)
JJ, Mattson and Alec dive into a critical discussion of the 1996 holiday film "Jingle All the Way," highlighting its shortcomings and the reasons why it has garnered a negative reception. The hosts express their disdain for the movie, with one even giving it a score of 0.5, citing its over-the-top performances and lack of a compelling message about Christmas. They reflect on the absurdity of the plot and the unrealistic portrayal of holiday shopping chaos, drawing from their own retail experiences. The conversation shifts to the failed attempts at humor and the film's inability to deliver meaningful life lessons, contrasting it with more cherished holiday classics. Ultimately, the hosts share their mutual agreement on the film's poor quality, making for a lively and entertaining critique filled with personal anecdotes and shared frustrations.
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Transcript
And the kid that is the.
Speaker A:The dad's son.
Speaker A:I hate that kid.
Speaker A:He's in some other.
Speaker A:He's the Anakin kid.
Speaker A:Hate him, like, just don't like him.
Speaker B:Oh, poor Jake Lloyd.
Speaker C:Wow.
Speaker A:Yeah, Jake Lloyd.
Speaker B:And that right there is why he went to jail later in life.
Speaker B:Welcome to the what's Already podcast.
Speaker B:We fashion ourselves cinematic judge and Jerry.
Speaker B:My name is J.J.
Speaker B:crowder.
Speaker B:I'm here with my co host Mat Heiner.
Speaker A:It's turbo time.
Speaker A:Better red than dead.
Speaker B:And Alec Burgess.
Speaker C:Let's get it.
Speaker B:We appreciate you tuning in.
Speaker B:Go ahead, hit that.
Speaker B:Follow subscribe like bell notification buttons to keep up with us and make sure you know when new episodes come out.
Speaker B:Also, help us grow the podcast.
Speaker B:Go tell a friend about us.
Speaker B:Tell a family member about us.
Speaker B:Tell a belligerent mailman or a knuckleheaded father that waits to the last minute to go Christmas shopping about us.
Speaker B:We'll take all of their listens, watches, follows.
Speaker B:Man, it's week three of Christmas movies.
Speaker B:I cannot believe we're three weeks into December when it comes to movies, but here we are.
Speaker B:And this week's movie is.
Speaker B: ,: Speaker B:It was written by Randy Cornfield and it's directed by Brian Levant.
Speaker B:Stars Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sinbad, Phil Hartman, Rita Wilson, Robert Conrad, Martin Mole, Jake Lloyd, Jim Belushi, and Lorraine Newman.
Speaker B:It's about a father who vows to get his son a Turboman action figure for Christmas.
Speaker B:However, every store is sold out.
Speaker B:He must travel all over town and compete with everybody else in order to find one.
Speaker B:Alec, this is your pick too?
Speaker C:Yes, sir.
Speaker B:Why do I hate you in Christmas time?
Speaker B:Like, I feel like.
Speaker A:I feel like.
Speaker B:It's very purposeful, all of these nasty choices.
Speaker C:No.
Speaker C:Maybe a little.
Speaker C:I told you I had some fun this month.
Speaker B:Only.
Speaker B:Only your third pick makes you worthwhile the rest of this month because, geez, you've hurt my soul.
Speaker B:This.
Speaker B:How did 3 out of 5 movies get picked for Alex?
Speaker C:I am lucky.
Speaker B:That's fair.
Speaker B:So why this movie?
Speaker A:Means our patrons have bad taste.
Speaker A:Please join our Patreon so we can have more voters.
Speaker A:Thank you.
Speaker A:Public service announcement.
Speaker B:There you go.
Speaker C:Why pick Jingle Away?
Speaker C:Okay.
Speaker C:Face value, right?
Speaker C:Face value.
Speaker C:Reason.
Speaker C:We're out of good Christmas movies.
Speaker C:And I refuse to put, like, a Hallmark movie on the list ever.
Speaker C:That's never gonna happen.
Speaker C:A little bit deeper.
Speaker C:And I know it's gonna bake a good podcast episode because the movie sucks enough that you motherfuckers aren't gonna like, it either.
Speaker B:That's fair.
Speaker B:That's fair.
Speaker C:There are parts in this that get me.
Speaker C:And it stems entirely from.
Speaker C:I think they did the retail scenes perfectly.
Speaker C:Like, I've worked in retail before and the kind of creative license they took.
Speaker C:You know, when he's in, like, I need to find a turbo window, and the guy just starts laughing.
Speaker C:I'm like, like, that's everybody who works in retail.
Speaker C:Christmas around Christmas time or Black Friday, everything like that is what you want to do to the people who come into the stores.
Speaker C:Are you stupid?
Speaker C:You're asking me for what?
Speaker C:Do you know what day it is?
Speaker C:Or even, like, earlier where the guy's got a stopwatch and he's timing when to open the doors.
Speaker C:He's pointing at the door.
Speaker C:I was that person.
Speaker C:And so this little.
Speaker C:You know what?
Speaker C:I.
Speaker C:I worked for the Disney Store, right?
Speaker C:In the mall.
Speaker C:And Christmas Eve I was working and our mall closed at 6, and I got put on the door and I had so many people trying to come in.
Speaker C:Because the way it works, right, Is if you're in the store, you can finish up your shopping.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker C:Oh, I was at that gate and I was like, you're not coming in.
Speaker C:Like, I need.
Speaker B:That one's right there.
Speaker C:And I'm like, and we've been open since 10am where have you been?
Speaker C:It was the only time I was allowed to be that belligerent.
Speaker C:So it speaks to me on a very personal level, those scenes specifically.
Speaker C:But there is.
Speaker C:This is not a good movie.
Speaker C:I don't enjoy watching the whole thing, but I also knew that YouTube wouldn't enjoy watching it.
Speaker C:And that's enough for me to pick it.
Speaker B:Yeah, you're welcome.
Speaker B:What about you, Max?
Speaker B:Had you seen this before?
Speaker B:Is this your first watch through?
Speaker A:I came across this movie, unfortunately, last Christmas because Tay puts on all kinds of Christmas movies.
Speaker A:I don't know why she put on this movie because she doesn't even like this movie.
Speaker A:This movie.
Speaker A:I forgot what this movie was until I started watching this, when I was like, oh, wait, I know this movie.
Speaker A:And immediately was very not happy and was contemplating just not watching the rest of it because I remember it, but I forgot some of the middle parts.
Speaker A:And, man, this movie is a 90s movie through and through.
Speaker A:The parts that Alex said were funny are not funny.
Speaker A:It was so, like, overacted.
Speaker C:Have you worked in retail?
Speaker A:I have worked in retail.
Speaker A:I once was putting on helping a mom get a shoe for their child, thinking that child was a female and it was actually a male, and it Was awkward.
Speaker A:I've had.
Speaker A:I.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:There.
Speaker A:And I did it during Black Friday and all kinds of stuff.
Speaker A:Don't miss any of that.
Speaker A:But this movie sucks.
Speaker A:This movie is terrible.
Speaker A:Arnold Schwarzenegger can't act in this movie.
Speaker A:Can't really act in any movie but this movie.
Speaker A:No sin.
Speaker A:Bad.
Speaker A:Terrible.
Speaker A:The radio host, terrible.
Speaker A:Like, none of it's believable.
Speaker A:It's so overdone and stupid.
Speaker A:And then the whole terrible man costume.
Speaker A:I'm sorry.
Speaker A:Like, really, like, really.
Speaker A:Like, if we could do that as a society back in the night.
Speaker A:Like, no.
Speaker A:The suspension of disbelief in this movie is ridiculous.
Speaker A:The only part that has any redeeming value isn't a good value.
Speaker A:It's the stupid neighbor that's trying to cop the dude's wife.
Speaker A:And, like, that part, like, makes me like, oh, that's kind of funny.
Speaker A:He's being devious.
Speaker A:And then he totally gets what's coming to him.
Speaker A:But what's funny is.
Speaker A:And probably in real life, that guy probably would have won.
Speaker A:So that's how those things actually happen.
Speaker A:But in this movie, you know, it's got to go the good way.
Speaker A:All that to say too much verbiage for a crappy movie like this movie.
Speaker A:Just.
Speaker A:I never, ever, ever want to watch this movie again.
Speaker A:It's terrible.
Speaker A:The only way I could have liked this movie is I watched it when I was a kid, and I like to think I better taste.
Speaker A:My gosh, this movie is terrible.
Speaker A:And the kid.
Speaker A:That is the.
Speaker A:The dad's son.
Speaker A:I hate that kid.
Speaker A:He's in some other.
Speaker A:He's the Anakin kid.
Speaker A:Hate him.
Speaker A:Like, just don't like him.
Speaker B:Oh, poor Jake Lloyd.
Speaker C:Wow.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:And that right there is why he went to jail later in life.
Speaker A:Do not like him.
Speaker B:He took a lot of heat for Star wars.
Speaker B:And if I don't know, this film was produced by Lucasfilm.
Speaker B:So it was probably why he got.
Speaker A:Not his fault in Star wars so much.
Speaker A:But I wish they.
Speaker B:He.
Speaker A:Yeah, he should have done something else in acting, probably, but, you know, he tried.
Speaker B:Yeah, well, this.
Speaker B:This is.
Speaker B:This would certainly be why he ended up in episode one, because Luke's film made this film.
Speaker B:But anyway, I hate this movie, too.
Speaker B:It's bad.
Speaker B:It's.
Speaker B:It's terrible.
Speaker B:I mean, it's.
Speaker B:Here's the funny part is I had never seen this movie all the way through until I watched it for this.
Speaker C:You're welcome.
Speaker A:Well, and I think that's me, too, because there was some little piece.
Speaker A:I was like, wait, I don't remember that.
Speaker A:And I was like, oh, now I know why.
Speaker A:Because I couldn't suffer through this garbage.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:I was watching it going, this is bad.
Speaker B:Like, it's bad.
Speaker B:And it's.
Speaker B:It's bad.
Speaker B:And.
Speaker B:And the reason that you like the neighbor scenes is because Phil Hartman was a genius.
Speaker B:Rest his soul.
Speaker B:And he was.
Speaker B:The best part about the movie.
Speaker B:Hilarious.
Speaker B:That.
Speaker B:And then, like, I don't know why, but the cop that he always ends up running into, that part makes me laugh.
Speaker B:I don't know why, but it makes me laugh all the way.
Speaker B:And then, you know, the idiots, like, oh, Turbo man, you're the man.
Speaker B:Don't worry about it.
Speaker B:It's just like.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:It's so ridiculous.
Speaker B:And I.
Speaker B:You know, and I realize it's made for kids, right?
Speaker B:Like, the whole thing is made for.
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker B:But at the same time, like, I don't remember being that stupid as a kid that I would think that this was funny or great.
Speaker B:And, I mean, granted, I was.
Speaker C:You weren't a kid when this was.
Speaker B:I was.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:But even as a kid, I don't.
Speaker B:I just don't know that I'd be like, oh, look, his dad's Turbo man flying around on a jet pack.
Speaker B:That should have killed him two seconds.
Speaker B:And though five minutes before that was pretty funny.
Speaker B:That's another line that gets me is when they're.
Speaker B:They grab him and they're like, this is the guy.
Speaker B:And they start putting the costume on him, and the guy's going a mile a minute about the.
Speaker B:That's going to kill you about the suit.
Speaker B:Like, that part made me laugh.
Speaker B:But other than that, like, God, it's just not that funny.
Speaker B:And like, the weird.
Speaker B:Come on, man.
Speaker B:It's 96.
Speaker B:You got to be able to make a moose look a little more realistic in the face than that.
Speaker B:Like, Jesus.
Speaker B:Like, its teeth were like, what the is wrong with this reindeer?
Speaker B:And why is it in, like, just outside New York City, New York?
Speaker B:Like, what the is going on?
Speaker B:Anyway?
Speaker B:Phil Hartman, he's the man.
Speaker B:But, yeah, this movie's terrible.
Speaker B:It's terrible.
Speaker B:And I hate you for making me watch it all the way.
Speaker C:You're welcome.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker C:The only other part that I kind of enjoy as well.
Speaker C:I don't know what it is, but I like almost this bad Santa, because the Santa racketeering ring.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker C:It's also funny.
Speaker B:Fair.
Speaker B:That's fair.
Speaker A:This is mob style.
Speaker A:It.
Speaker A:It was terrible.
Speaker B:Jim Belushi's funny, too.
Speaker B:So that.
Speaker C:Yeah.
Speaker B:You know, his Santa.
Speaker B:Yeah, that was pretty funny.
Speaker A:It's a Horrible movie.
Speaker A:Arnold Schwarzenegger is riding the high of all of his other stuff.
Speaker A:And think around.
Speaker A:There's some movies obviously of him that we've heard me reveal it.
Speaker A:I like him in the right thing.
Speaker A:He's perfect.
Speaker A:But like, when he tried to do these other movies where they actually need him to do a little bit of dialogue and do something outside of Austin, baby, it's just, in my opinion, never really worked.
Speaker A:And this movie just suffers for his horribleness and then sin bad.
Speaker A:Like, just horrible.
Speaker A:They're fight scenes.
Speaker A:This package is a bomb.
Speaker A:The over.
Speaker A:Like, I love how kids movies, cops always come out with the guns.
Speaker A:Like, and there was a report like someone broke him.
Speaker A:Like, shoot first, ask questions later.
Speaker A:I guess that's kind of true.
Speaker C:It was the 90s.
Speaker A:I know, man.
Speaker A:It's just.
Speaker A:It's just over.
Speaker A:Like every 90s.
Speaker A:It's just over the top cliche.
Speaker A:You know how it's going to end.
Speaker A:It's gonna.
Speaker A:It's gonna be perfect.
Speaker A:Just.
Speaker B:Well, I think what's the worst part about this?
Speaker B:Like, when you think of it from a Christmas movie perspective?
Speaker B:Because, look, Christmas movies are hard.
Speaker B:They're either really interesting or they're terrible.
Speaker B:And most of them are terrible.
Speaker B:And this one falls into that.
Speaker B:But at least most of them, like the cheesy, sappy Christmas ending tries to remind you why Christmas is important.
Speaker B:This one doesn't even do that.
Speaker B:Like, it just makes this dad look like a hero.
Speaker B:And it like everything falls into place even though he's probably killed six people in this movie and that's just the ones he was trying to hurt.
Speaker B:Like, it's just like, wait, what?
Speaker B:And then at least, you know, a dozen police officers were in that bomb explosion that only fucked up the one dude's hands.
Speaker B:And I'm like, wait, what?
Speaker B:So it's just like they didn't even get to the point at the end where they're like, okay, let's make it a Christmas movie and teach everyone a lesson about how life is beautiful.
Speaker B:And we should all take Christmas and, you know, life more.
Speaker B:Like the more important things should be important.
Speaker B:And the not important thing, like they had that shit's teed up throughout this movie.
Speaker B:Because the Alex point.
Speaker B:The other part that always makes me laugh is the ball fight, like over like the raffle balls.
Speaker B:Like, that shit makes me giggle a little bit.
Speaker B:But like, so pointing out the worst parts of Christmas, even to.
Speaker B:In a caricature form, like, but then they don't even pay it off with.
Speaker A:Like, yeah, that's a Good point.
Speaker A:Because they had all that.
Speaker A:You're waiting at the end to be like, okay, like, tell me that presents aren't the thing.
Speaker A:It's like about those.
Speaker A:You spend Christmas.
Speaker A:And I never really did that because even did you guys know, people don't care about Christmas.
Speaker C:They care about presents.
Speaker A:That's fair.
Speaker A:You guys know there's an end credit scene?
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:I didn't know that because I.
Speaker A:I left it on.
Speaker A:I was like eating and then I was like, oh, never knew that this was a scene because even at the very end, she's just essentially asked, like, what did you get me?
Speaker A:Yeah, okay.
Speaker B:Yeah, it's terrible.
Speaker B:There's no life lesson in this.
Speaker B:There's no make sure.
Speaker B:What's important is important.
Speaker B:It's, hey, if you go and take part in all the Christmas shenanigans, eventually everything will work out and then your kids love you again.
Speaker A:I don't miss any of the Black Friday stuff.
Speaker A:I've never, like.
Speaker A:I'm so thankful for online shopping because I don't.
Speaker A:I never had do a ton of it, but never enjoyed going to crazy malls and having to try to finagle all the stuff.
Speaker A:Jay, you should tell us your worst Black Friday experience.
Speaker B:I don't have one.
Speaker A:You never did it?
Speaker A:You never shop?
Speaker B:Never.
Speaker B:I don't like on my best day, I don't like going shopping when the stores are empty.
Speaker B:I am not going to stand in line for something that I can spend a couple hundred bucks more for and not have to go through the hassle of someone that wants to kick my ass if I'm in front of them in line.
Speaker B:I.
Speaker B:It just in standing in line to show there are very few things that I will stand in line for, and shopping is not one of them.
Speaker B:And so I'm grateful for online shopping, too.
Speaker B:But I've been grateful for online shopping for a very long time.
Speaker B:And it has nothing to do with Black Friday because I just don't like leaving my house, let alone going on a day when it's just.
Speaker B:I don't even.
Speaker B:I do everything I can to not leave my house on Black Friday, even if it's just to go to, like, somewhere completely different.
Speaker B:Especially back when it was a thing.
Speaker B:Thing.
Speaker B:I mean, it's still a thing, but was.
Speaker B:It was like you had to go to the stores and like, like, I didn't.
Speaker B:I'm out because, like, I'm not a nice person in the general public.
Speaker B:And when the general public is in, like, the worst state possible, I'm certainly not a nice Person.
Speaker B:I still don't.
Speaker B:Now, I will say that there's places like, so Christmas time to.
Speaker B:For me.
Speaker B:So we shop at a store that is down in another city a couple miles down the road.
Speaker B:Well, the store that's closest is that one that.
Speaker B:But it's part of one of these walking malls now.
Speaker B:Like, it's just.
Speaker B:There's like a walking outdoor mall, and then there's like, a thing of stores that's kind of detect, like, separated from them big piece of the walking mall.
Speaker B:And then the grocery store that I shop at is right there.
Speaker B:So it's like a parking lot away from this walking mall.
Speaker B:Dude, I go to a completely different grocery store during Christmas, like, the month of December.
Speaker B:I can't shop there because it's like, I don't even get out of my car in the worst place.
Speaker B:But, like, there's people everywhere, cars everywhere.
Speaker B:And I want to run most of them over as I'm driving in and out of the parking lot.
Speaker B:Because I just.
Speaker B:I'm just like.
Speaker A:I thought you were very patient individual, jj, as you told us in our.
Speaker B:Last podcast, I'm very patient with people that I know.
Speaker B:I probably should have been more clarifying on that, like, or in situations where I need to be.
Speaker B:But if I'm in the safety of my own car and I'm trying to go somewhere that shouldn't have a full parking lot with holes walking around everywhere and getting in my way and being disrespectful and discourteous, my patience immediately goes out the window.
Speaker B:But that's also because I don't like driving anymore.
Speaker B:I used to love driving.
Speaker B:I don't like driving anymore.
Speaker B:I don't even.
Speaker B:Like.
Speaker B:I.
Speaker B:The.
Speaker B:The older I get, the more agoraphobic I get, which, that's the wrong term because I am not actually afraid of it.
Speaker B:I'm just angered by it.
Speaker B:Like, I don't like people when it comes to, like, the general public hate it.
Speaker B:I hate grocery stores most of the time in grocery stores, and I'm pushing the cart.
Speaker B:Like, I have fantasies of mowing people down with my shopping cart.
Speaker A:Like, you don't just do, like, online grocery orders at this point?
Speaker B:No, I.
Speaker B:I don't trust people.
Speaker B:Like, I've had bad experiences with it.
Speaker B:I've tried it.
Speaker B:But, like, I don't like somebody shopping for me because I especially like.
Speaker B:We eat a lot of produce, and so I don't like when I get a mushy goddamn apple.
Speaker B:I'm like, really?
Speaker B:Either you pack this so hard that my Apple turned to applesauce in the time that you did it or you just picked a shitty apple, in which case the is going on.
Speaker B:So I prefer to be able to go and pick my own.
Speaker B:It's kind of a double edged sword.
Speaker A:But JJ is one of those people that just reads a one star review just because he can.
Speaker A:Sounds like.
Speaker B:Yeah, I don't leave reviews.
Speaker B:I won't say that too because it's still funny to me that they, there's, there's.
Speaker B:I've left like I left more reviews for like past employers than I have for anything else.
Speaker B:Like that's it.
Speaker C:What about you Madsen?
Speaker C:What's your worst Black Friday story?
Speaker A:Oh no, I don't even have one.
Speaker A:I barely ever.
Speaker A:I can't even last time I've done that.
Speaker A:I just now these days I'm just skeptical of Black Friday deals on like Cyber Monday and all that stuff.
Speaker A:I just, I think most companies on like Amazon and stuff, they mark, they the prices are higher like three weeks before and then Cyber Monday or Black Friday week it's like oh, it's on sale.
Speaker A:And it's like well is it really on sale or did you just like mark it down and makes us feel like it's on sale.
Speaker A:Marked first then yeah, marked it up and then.
Speaker A:Or like it slowly marked it up over time in preparation for that so they can still make a good profit on that.
Speaker A:I'm just pretty skeptical of.
Speaker A:Hey look, we, they.
Speaker A:These companies just want to make a lot of money so I just don't.
Speaker A:Yeah, is it a deal?
Speaker A:But I'm like, is it really as much of a deal as it used to be?
Speaker A:I think because there's always sales like every day.
Speaker A:I'm like, is this one more special than the last one?
Speaker A:You just told me there was a sale yesterday.
Speaker A:So like what is it?
Speaker B:It's all, it's all psychology.
Speaker B:It's.
Speaker B:That's all it is.
Speaker A:99 cents is better.
Speaker A:299 is better than $3.
Speaker A:Jay.
Speaker A:It really I.
Speaker A:Hey, that's a good deal.
Speaker B:Yep.
Speaker C:I'll buy two for 299 before I buy one for three.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:Well it's just like the memberships that like stores and stuff, right?
Speaker B:So like you have the little card that you get the bonus bucks or whatever and the gas like the most, the best deal you're getting is gas points.
Speaker B:Like that's it.
Speaker B:Like because all the other shit it's get.
Speaker B:They're, they use it to get rid of their shit that's been on the shelf forever or that's going out of stock or they don't want to carry as much.
Speaker B:It's not about.
Speaker B:And they still the markup, especially in groceries.
Speaker B:This is not have anything to do with Christmas.
Speaker B:But the markup and grocery is one of the biggest markups period across the board.
Speaker B:So deals are still raping you, raking you over the coals.
Speaker B:So it's just like whatever.
Speaker B:But I'm grateful for Costco.
Speaker A:Grateful for Costco gas.
Speaker A:I'll say that.
Speaker A:Not sponsored by Costco, but at least their gas is a little bit cheaper because of freaking hate.
Speaker A:Gas prices here in Washington are crazy.
Speaker A:Anyways, we digress.
Speaker A:Christmas like the movie is talking about is these days it's so easy just to be like, oh yeah, it's about present.
Speaker A:Whether you're religious or not.
Speaker A:It's very easy to just forget that all these movies and stuff want it to be about presents and presents equate to happiness.
Speaker A:When at the end of the day, like the older I get, like I don't even.
Speaker A:There's absolutely nothing I need for Christmas.
Speaker A:There's nothing.
Speaker A:There's one thing I want, I want the.
Speaker A:This new Stormlight book from Brandon Sanderson.
Speaker A:That's like the only want I can even think of because we're all grown people.
Speaker A:Like shit.
Speaker A:I know Jay, if he wants it, he bought it already.
Speaker A:And so like at this point I like, I just value the ability to take time away from work and like, and just enjoy it.
Speaker A:It's fun.
Speaker A:Now we have like banks for instance.
Speaker A:He's still too little.
Speaker A:But seeing Christmas through someone else's eyes and seeing the excitement they have for like a gift or something that they're going to play or like I just don't have that anymore because I don't need anything.
Speaker A:I wish I could be transported back to like my 11 year old self and just remember that feeling.
Speaker A:Because damn, Christmas was something special then.
Speaker A:Nowadays it doesn't have that feeling.
Speaker A:But I try to just surround myself with like good vibes and bring back the memories and try to not get so caught up in the hoopla of having to spend like a ton of money.
Speaker B:Yeah, I don't like that it doesn't have a mess and I'm with you.
Speaker B:Like we don't even Christmas.
Speaker B:You're right.
Speaker B:I buy whatever the.
Speaker B:So there's a rule in our family too though, like from like the beginning of November through December, you're not allowed to buy your own unless it's a necessity like, you have to put a pot.
Speaker B:Because otherwise.
Speaker B:Because I.
Speaker B:And it.
Speaker B:That rule was pretty much made for being Casey because we just.
Speaker B:It.
Speaker B:We just bought.
Speaker A:So what are you gonna buy your partner at that point?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:You're making something up that, like, you didn't really want anyways.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:And that's.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:So now we'd go to Christmas and get like a gift and I'm in my head going, well, you just bought that last week, so we'll take that one back.
Speaker B:You know what I mean?
Speaker B:We wouldn't tell anybody.
Speaker B:But yeah.
Speaker B:So, like, that's one of those rules that Casey's family introduced to.
Speaker B:Like, I was like, okay, that's smart.
Speaker B:Just, you put a hiatus on buying anything that you want, you can only buy you need.
Speaker B:So it's like.
Speaker B:But yeah, it's.
Speaker B:It's tough as an adult.
Speaker B:I do get excited watching the little kids, though, because they still get, like, super excited as they come running in and sitting under the tree and they're having fun.
Speaker B:And I have more fun watching them open presents and lose their.
Speaker B:Than anything else that we do.
Speaker B:In fact, it's funny.
Speaker B:Like, Casey and I both got each other presents and hers came first for me, came like two days ago.
Speaker B:And they're.
Speaker B:I'm wearing them on my feet right now.
Speaker B:And then the one that I got her, she's literally putting on the bed right now.
Speaker B:So it's like, we don't even wait until it's December fucking third and we've already had our presence because it's just like, hey, that's a nice thing for you to do.
Speaker B:I probably would have bought that for us both or myself, like in two weeks.
Speaker B:So.
Speaker B:But, you know, we make sure that there's an opportunity to do that stuff.
Speaker B:But it's just so tough as an adult.
Speaker B:But that's.
Speaker B:I think that's probably if I'm half.
Speaker B:If I'm being honest, like, from Christmas movie perspective, like, it's so lazy.
Speaker B:Like, how do you make a movie that doesn't even have a good message in the end of it?
Speaker B:Because this just doesn't.
Speaker B:And that's a waste of Christmas movies.
Speaker B:No, even the worst Christmas movie.
Speaker B:Like, at least even the worst freaking movie that we reviewed pre last week, Christmas Story still has some good messages in it, right?
Speaker B:Like, it ends in the family eat at a Chinese restaurant and enjoying themselves and having fun together.
Speaker B:But this one's like, oh, I gotta go run a gig saying get my wife anything if you stick around long enough.
Speaker B:Or it just ends on Straight up, my dad saved the day being a dick.
Speaker B:Like, what the.
Speaker C:That's a good life lesson.
Speaker C:Don't be nice and you'll win.
Speaker B:There you go.
Speaker B:Alec just added fuel to his own fire.
Speaker A:All right, let's rate this thing.
Speaker C:My movie.
Speaker C:I get to go first.
Speaker B:You're doing this first thing three times, and you got last week because you hijacked Matson's pick when he wasn't here.
Speaker C:And see proof.
Speaker C:Okay, I'm a dick and I'm winning.
Speaker C:So both of y'all.
Speaker B:No.
Speaker C:So I don't like this movie.
Speaker C:I do get a chuckle out of the retail experiences because they're so outlandish.
Speaker C:But you can see it on, like, employees faces when you go into retail when they're just about done and want to do this exact thing.
Speaker C:And I love the Santa racketeering because I just find it hilarious how stupid it is.
Speaker C:But it's not a good movie.
Speaker C:I'm giving it a one.
Speaker C:Like, I watched it purely to make you guys Mr.
Speaker B:Guy.
Speaker A:All right, pick me.
Speaker A:This movie is a 0.5.
Speaker A:It's terrible.
Speaker A:Done.
Speaker B:I love it when Matson's so salty.
Speaker B:He doesn't even give a review.
Speaker B:He's just like, this movie sucks.
Speaker B:It's a 0.5.
Speaker B:Move on.
Speaker B:Or it's so good, he has nothing to say what was a couple weeks ago you were like five?
Speaker B:I don't remember.
Speaker A:I remember what that was.
Speaker B:I don't either.
Speaker B:Anyway, I'm giving it a one.
Speaker B:It's bad.
Speaker B:It's.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:For it to get the same rating as Christmas Story.
Speaker B:It's bad.
Speaker B:Like, I don't like it.
Speaker B:It's weird.
Speaker B:Arnold sucks.
Speaker B:Sinbad sucks.
Speaker B:Phil Hartman was the only thing that saved this movie in even the slightest possible way.
Speaker B:Yeah, that's about it.
Speaker B:And it's.
Speaker B:And then the funny.
Speaker B:Weird.
Speaker B:I'm with you, Alec.
Speaker B:Like, I love watching the caricature of.
Speaker B:Of retail shopping on Christmas.
Speaker C:You're gonna form one orderly line and get a raffle ball.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker B:And then they end up like.
Speaker B:Yeah, it's just.
Speaker B:It's terrible.
Speaker B:I was surprised, though, at the.
Speaker B:I mean, I've been surprised these last two weeks.
Speaker B:How much was in these two movies that we've done recently that get people in some serious trouble nowadays if they made that.
Speaker B:Like, it's just like, what the is happening.
Speaker B:But, yeah, these are.
Speaker B:This is a terrible movie.
Speaker B:And I hate you again for making me watch this movie.
Speaker C:You're welcome.
Speaker B:So, Alex winning.
Speaker C:I'm here for a good time.
Speaker C:Not a long time.
Speaker B:At least next.
Speaker B:At least next week he has a good choice that we get to talk about.
Speaker B:So there it is.
Speaker B:I can jingle all the way.
Speaker B:Merry Christmas, Alex.
Speaker B:Tell everybody where they can find us.
Speaker C:Happy too.
Speaker C:So this is week three of.
Speaker C:I'm just gonna call it Christmas Movie Bonanza.
Speaker B:There we go.
Speaker C:Christmas Movie Bonanza.
Speaker A:Special thanks to naming this Christmas movies that Alec picked that he wanted the torch.
Speaker A:Oh, perfect.
Speaker C:This is.
Speaker C:This is week three of Alex Month.
Speaker B:Thank you very much.
Speaker C:I'm taking all the credit for every single movie.
Speaker C:Week three of Alex Month.
Speaker C:Special thanks to our patrons for picking such a great topic.
Speaker C:By the way, phenomenal choice.
Speaker C:Rich mel Brooks and JJ's Extra Large Pepperidge Farm wiener.
Speaker C:That's the first time I felt good saying that.
Speaker C:Like Mattson just put me up on cloud nine with saying this.
Speaker B:I love.
Speaker C:So check us out on YouTube where you want to see our smiling, giggling faces or, you know, for poor JJ and Matts, in the last couple of weeks it's been nothing but disappointment, frowns and judging all of my life's choices.
Speaker C:Other than that, Patreon is a place to find us where you can get behind the scenes content.
Speaker C:There's up to now like 400 little episodes or 400 extra videos that you guys can indulge in.
Speaker C:That's the best place to get involved.
Speaker C:So you can pick topics.
Speaker C:You can choose on movies that we select for those topics.
Speaker C:And then you guys also have the ability to suggest quarterly picks.
Speaker C:And we got a Q4 banger lined up for poor old JJ.
Speaker C:With that though, I will kick it back to the wazir of wap.
Speaker C:Jack Dunn's baby Scrooge himself a jj.
Speaker B:That's right.
Speaker B:I was very sad that Charles didn't pick Scrooge.
Speaker B:That's one of my.
Speaker B:Yeah, I got.
Speaker B:I had a whole list of great.
Speaker C:Christmas movies and you did not realize.
Speaker B:It'S my month and now and I got hijacked by Alex picks.
Speaker B:Yeah, thanks, Alec.
Speaker B:Appreciate it.
Speaker B:And to everyone else, we appreciate you tuning in.
Speaker B:We'll catch you on the next.
Speaker C:Bye, Austin la Vista, baby.
Speaker B:That was weird.
